Friday night November 25th 2011, I woke up with a nightmare about my precious baby boy. I woke Ryan up and told him I had a bad dream about Landon. It was that we were at the doctor and they told us that he had no heartbeat. Ryan comforted me and we went back to sleep.
Saturday November 26th 2011, was a check up day for us. The military treatment facility here at Fort Bragg, Womack, tries to give you one Saturday appointment so that the soldier can go with you. This was an ultrasound appointment for us and it happened not as we expected. The rules at Womack state that they first take the mother back to get pictures of the baby then they bring the father back. They took me back and the nurse just did not seem right to me. She then went and got Ryan and made us wait for what seemed a lifetime. The radiologist came in with the nurse and told us that our baby had a fetal demise. I asked what that means and he said that he had no heartbeat.
From there we went upstairs to Labor and Delivery. There they performed another ultrasound and told us that Landon was no longer with us. From there, we came home and decided that we would take care of everything on Monday. But once we got home, it was just too hard. We decided to go to the hospital the next day. We let all of our family and friends know what we found out. My parents decided that they wanted to be here for us, so they drove all night Saturday night to get here.
Sunday November 27th 2011, we went in the hospital at 0600. They performed another ultrasound and told us for the third time that there was no movement and no heartbeat. They also told us that the heart cambers had collapsed and that this meant he had been gone for a bit...
I was admitted and given some tablets to make me go into labor. They called it an 'induction'... that word still sinks my heart. I would never wish that upon the worst person I know. From there, I had cramps and the worst pain all over my body that I have ever felt. It was a heart wrenching 12 hours.
Then at 7:45 pm, Landon Ryan Brown was born. He was born at 5 inches long, weighing 3 pounds, 1 oz. He is beautiful and so tiny. He truly is the most gorgeous Angel I have ever seen. He is our 'Baby Angel'.
He will never be forgotten and I ask that you never forget him. We will always tell everyone about him and he is our first born. Please do not feel weird to mention his name around me or to talk about him to me. He will always have a stocking hung at Christmas, a birthday balloon release November 27th and we will always be his mommy and daddy. Our future kids will know that they have an amazing Baby Angel Brother in heaven. I was told by a good army sister that "He was just to perfect for this world" and that is what I firmly believe.
After giving birth to Landon, we were told that my placenta was still attached to my uterous wall. They gave me lots of medicine to see if it would pass, but it would not. About 1 am, Monday November 28th, I was taken into surgery. I received a spinal block, twilight anesthesia and they were able to take care of removing the attached placenta. The doctor was amazing and so very good to me. I lost quite a bit of blood during surgery, 5 - 6 pints and the normal is about 3 - 4 pints. I was released Monday November 28th, about 8:30 to come home.
Current status update:
I am quite white, from all the blood loss and very swollen all over. I am taking things day by day and sometimes, hour by hour. Things are going okay one moment, then other moments I am laughing, and I am sometimes crying because I miss Landon so much.
I ask that you please keep us in your prayers. The next few months and even years will be hard and even horrible at times. We will survive this hard time together and we will have more children in the future. We are keeping ourselves busy and holding onto family and friends. Thank you for every prayer, email, text and good thought that all of you have sent our way. We appreciate the love.
<3
Always in our hearts <3 Landon Ryan Brown <3 November 27th 2011
My heart sunk when i saw the news! If you need anything, dont hesitate to send me a message, text, or phone call. Ill listen! Praying for you all! <3
ReplyDeleteMay god give you and your family the strength that you need during these hard times. We will keep you and your family in our prayers. May Angel Landon Brown rejoice in heaven.
ReplyDeleteGod Bless you
Paiz Family